What if I had a different life?

Hello everyone!

Happy new month, may this month usher in the best of all we desire.

Lately, I have been thinking on what to blog, the events that resonate with our lives that we may draw a lesson or two from. I soon realised the only thing on my mind right now is me. My thoughts, feelings, and moods seemed momentarily glued on just me, and not just me, but me in the past. This usually  happens around this time on a yearly basis because I will be a year older in twelve day's time. The gratitude, nolstagia, and expectations around my birthday celebration and all pushes my constant busy mind into some kind of introspection.

What would life have been if I were on a different path? If I made a different choice among those that have greatly impacted my life? If I pursued a different dream or if I simply were a different person altogether. If my personality wasn't formed or shaped around what it presently is. If I had different influences, philosophies and notions that nurtured my growth and formed my backgroud.

Would I be happier, richer, more successful, more famous, more influencial or would i be miserable, stranded, unsuccessful, ungrateful, and unkind.
Would it not be something to somehow find out if I would still be here no matter what I had choosen earlier in life and the path I have followed earlier in life. Would I still be a better person, or just a random figure still wandering around the planet. Were there things in my past I could have changed or did differently that would have altered my life positively permanently in a far measure than this, well, I bet there must be loads of those things.

Sometimes, it is fair to wear the hat of a stranger and take a critical walk unbiasly into one's life and examine the kind of life that has been led so far. You can be your best critic and your best cheerleader, the choice is always personal.

As I reflect on my coming birthday, I am glad am still around, I am content where I have been and where I am so far, Iam hopeful, thoughtful, and mindful of how I havae turned out as a person over the years and where to improve upon. I hold no regret but I can't help but wonder what would have happened if I went after different girls, studied different courses, lived in different cities, had different frineds, made different enemies, and pursued different passions. Even if only for the fun of it, I dare to allow myself such luxury of thinking about the past introspectively.

So, I asked a friend if something is wrong with me for doing this, if maybe it is not healthy emotionally but I found even the mere exercise of introspection has its own benefit and I am not alone in this case, I found most people do it too anyways.

The Lesson here is this;
Introspection  helps to be aware and apt about times gone by, never to be regained.
It also helps to be aware of chapters not yet written in someone's story, changes can still be made, history can still be made.
It helps additionally to appreciate the value of time, how constantly it flies away speedily with changing seasons and cycles all over the world. It is nothing personal, it is just the way it is!.

So, that's how I allowed myself reminisce, humour, and soberness from the chapters of my previous days gone by.

WHAT CAN YOU LEARN FROM THIS?

What's LOVE got to do with it?

What’s LOVE got to do with it?

Hi friends, so it is that season of the year where everyone begins to carry goose-bumps and belly butterflies around right? Whether directly or indirectly, everyone is somewhat affected by the concept of Valentine, the celebration of romance or love or lovers or history or sainthood or whatever perception we have of it eventually.

I would like to take a moment to wish everyone a very SCINTILLATING VALENTINE. As a proponent of love, I want to dare you all to intentionally show the world the amount of love we got on the inside! Trip someone’s feet, fly someone on top of the world, and produce a smile on someone’s face deliberately. I am not asking for a random act of kindness, I am asking for a deliberate show of love to your world, those you  can see around you, familiar and unfamiliar faces, even our natural environment, animals, plants etc. Give your world a better treat of love. Let someone know you are there LOVING them from a spot, or motion. Not just for a day, no, for a season, this season at least.

Now I wouldn’t want to go into history of Saint Valentine, neither do I intend to bore you with what you already know. Love happens anyways to everyone at some point, and your definition of it is what is relative and very personal. Love like art holds a very strong sense of personal perception as standard without so much of any external infringement or influence. In order words, like art, your evaluation of it is actually what it is for you. No one can truly judge you on that. It doesn’t really matter whether it is what is generally accepted or not as standard, as far as it is what you see, and what you feel, to you, that is what is real. What you are able to see personally in it is what is true for you.

Love to most people is both emotional and mental and physical. Love takes all of you to prove a point. You cannot truly love partially, you can lust partially, but never truly be able to love partially. When you love a thing, you love it completely; the good, the bad, and the ugly of it. Else, you have not truly loved it and true love has not truly come without that reality.

The story for today for which I want to glean one or two lessons from is a simple one and am still not quite sure if it is truly factored on love or something else, although a lot of people might disagree I realise. It is akin to the popular Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet story. 

A lady gave her kidney to save the love of her life, after he was fine, the family insisted the lady is beneath their son to marry him, they do not belong to the same class. They told the lady off that while they are grateful for her help, they wouldn’t want her to see their son again. She was devastated, they were in love. He planned to elope with her. His parents found out and double crossed them, took their son away and the lady beaten to stupor for human theft. She was hospitalized and released to discover her love has been flown out of town. She immediately sank into depression. The guy too became sick to the point of death that he insisted the only thing he wanted was her. But too much has happened, the lady didn’t survive without him.  When the family brought their son back to beg the lady, they found she was gone and the guy lost all hope and went after her too. Their love and life was sniffled on the basis of culture, class, and social difference. Love seemed not enough to save them.

Now, this tragedy like the Romeo and Juliet saga that often happens under the guise of love, my question really is, what's love got to do with it? Is this a consequence of a love gone bad or a common sense gone missing. What is the measure and extent of the love of a parent to their child as compared to that of a lover to another lover, which is greater and which is lesser? Or could it just be a general fault from all involved that there seems to be a lack of wisdom for self-preservation and excitation when one seems to be at the expense of the other. When you want what you can't have or have what you can't want whichever the case. Well, I expect to hear your views and contributions to the fact.

The lesson here is this;

The heart seems a flirt, it loves freely whom it will but when it does, do not forget your mind in the process.

Secondly, when love happens, nothing else is certain. So, unless ready for the price, do not permit the pressure of desire to cage you.

Thirdly, everything in life comes with its own cost, even love.

Anyways, that’s the little I want to say for a love that ends badly, not all love ends that way. Some love stories have good and great ending. But before you make LOVE your excuse for life, please consider the cost.

WHAT CAN YOU LEARN ALSO FROM THIS?

Thanks for reading, love you big big and again HAPPY VALENTINE EVERYONE!.   

In search of TRUTH...

Hello You!

Yea..am back! And there is something on my mind to talk about today. I have not had too much time to ponder on it though but I am pretty sure I have had ample time to meditate and stay on the thought enough to want to spill the beans right here, right now.

My guess is as good as yours, I want to attempt to draw a lesson from literally anything around our everyday life. Not that I am going to be giving answers, well, I think God. paid professional counselors, pastors,  and/or google does that much better. But I have a knack and a guess that sometimes with or without an answer, we deserve a lesson. A packet of wisdom or knowledge that we directly or indirectly derive from our issues whether good or bad. We just want to know what it has all been for or why things happen the way they did or people acted, felt, spoke, or reasoned the way they did. We want in on anything that suggests or recommends to us that our struggles, pain, losses. successes, and victories has not been for nothing. Things do not just happen, even though accidents do happen especially in life, yet, there is always a cause, a reason why it does, something has to be learned from it.

There has to be something to learn right? There has to be some form of meaning to everything right? Whether what we go through ends well or not, at least we must be able at the end of the day to say that, yes! it was a mistake but i learned something. Yes! it was the right thing to do! And I learned something. A lesson must be gleaned from everything no matter how little or big. A lesson does not have to be the answer you seek but at least it can be your starting point in moving forward and onward. And when seldom the lesson offers a clue to your answer, then you hold all the aces to do right by your experience so far. A lesson gathered ensures that at least in all things, there is something to gain after-all regardless of what might have been lost. You see, a lesson will help restore the right perspective and give a hand in forging the way forward as your mind gains clarity over what just happened.

Here am I, staring in your face and strolling freely on your mind because you gave me a hand to hop in and join you in  your present journey, well, you are stuck with me here, and I only have one question to ask you now and always, WHAT CAN YOU LEARN FROM THIS?

Alright for today, the story on my mind is that of a broken home, a recently divorced parent with few teenagers left to start learning how to fend for themselves. The father paints the mother so bad, the kids begin to think of her as a witch. The mother does same, out of spite and hurt, paints their father so bad, the kids begin to think of him as a monster. When you begin to imagine yourself as a product of a witch and a monster, then the question arises that what does that make you? definitely something between an alien or an endangered specie, nothing from the realm of normal. The confusion you experience is better imagined than seen, and yet, you are stuck with this life, a victim, needing the most but seeing the least, and worst of all, forced to pick a side, because suddenly you realize, your home is broken. Parents are divorced, you cannot have them both, you got to have just one. You cannot love them both. You got to hate one and love the other and vice versa, because that is the dilemma they both put you into apart from modelling before your eyes the very worst of human nature; hate and hurt.

Confused, you begin to search, though sometimes you doubt the very story about your birth, doubting if they were really your parents, but somehow you knew they are, or they once were because there was a time you all were happy ever before, but now, the story is different. Your home is broken or better still reconstructed with just two apartments, one for mama, and the other for papa, the kids in the hall way to choose either place to live. You soon found your uncles and aunts all have their different tale of what happened to your parents, how they began, and what led them to where they are now, and yet you find that everyone already picked their sides except you. You are left alone in search of TRUTH. You would not hate your parent and yet you would not love them. You would not even know what to feel anymore, you are only more bothered about the truth because the rest of your life seems in jeopardy without it.

The LESSON here is this;
TRUTH is relative and in everything you hear, you will find a bit of truth, even in the most well-crafted lie!

In the search of TRUTH in life, one thing is certain, it is everywhere and it all depends on where you begin and what you really want or hope to see.

Till another time,
WHAT CAN YOU LEARN FROM THIS?  

Welcome on board!

Beautiful Morning to you all!

I hope our night was peaceful and warm.

For the next couple of days, months, years, I would be sharing tips and insights with respect to living beyond mere survival here. What I like to call "Life Lessons". As I pour out my thoughts, observations, and opinions here freely and abundantly, I hope you will find glimpses and nuggets that can help your own hustle or pursuit in life.

This is just an introduction, i intend for it to be brief!

Please expect epistles, and more epistles from the days to come to the degree with which the burden of the lesson being shared engulfs me.

Thanks for being here and for reading.

It is going to be fun and impact-ful I assure you.

Once again, I welcome you on board!